30 years ago – August 1991

August 1991 was a stressful month at work for me – several people I depended on took advantage of an early retirement offering from the company and the two projects I was working on were both demanding a lot of time. It might have been one of the highest overtime months of my career after motherhood. Between work and my daughter’s needs, I had very little discretionary time for myself. It was the month I fully appreciated how critical my husband’s support was to enable the peaks of my career.

We had a surprise visit from one of my aunts (with her husband and 2 grandchildren); they only stayed one night but it just added to the overwhelming activity for the month.

We had visited Texas in July and were getting follow up letters in August: my Mother starting her last year of teaching, one sister house hunting and planning to visit in October, another going through similar motherhood experiences with her child the same age as mine, and the sister 8 years younger than me realizing she didn’t know me very well. The documentation I have for the month is largely through those snail mail letters!

My daughter was savoring some activities at home that she had enjoyed for the first time while we were in Texas: dabs of shaving cream to wear around before playing in her pool (a substitute bath) and painting (on paper and herself). She was beginning to use her right hand more although she was not as strongly right-handed as her cousin. She discovered she could make footprints on the deck if she walked with wet feet.

She also remembered music from the Texas visit. Whenever the cassette tape with “Let’s go fly a kite” on it played…she always smiled and clapped when that song played.  

When we went to Wheaton Park we discovered she liked the swings under a large catalpa tree better than the carousel!

It was a time of tension between work and motherhood. The techniques I had for coping were developing - not perfect; over the next few years – I accepted that it was OK to always be developing rather that achieving perfection. But in August 1991, I was pushing for perfection.

I also noted a high ozone day. Looking back, I realize that if there had been action during the 1990s…the climate situation would be better today. I was aware of the greenhouse effect…and that the earth was warming; but in 1991 I thought it was an academic idea, not something that was actionable. Like so many others – I thought it would be very gradual and there would plenty of time for corrective action. So now we are facing an urgent need to pivot --- a challenge to us all. I find myself thinking about what it will be like in 30 years – trying to take actions in my own life to sustain hope for the successful transitions we’ll have to make going forward.